Eniola Omorinkoba: African Aunties as Custodians of Happy Marriages

One time, my African Auntie swore she recovered the close antheral for me. It was my Grandmother’s burial. The extended household had gathered for a full-blown Yoruba funeral. Aunty Yemisi, my aunt with a heavy scar connected her forehead, which she got successful 1 of the galore fights she utilized to person successful the neighbourhood with women with whom her hubby was frolicking, was the archetypal to inquire if I knew that time was nary longer connected my side, and I needed to get married. 

“I haven’t recovered the 1 yet, but arsenic soon arsenic I do, we’ll propulsion a party,” I responded reluctantly.

“Hope you’re not selecting?” She asked. 

“Aunty, I’m not selecting. But I person preferences.”

She clapped her hands successful the dramatic, African-style way. “I knew it. You’re discriminating. What if the volition of God for you is simply a abbreviated man?”

“That’s not the volition of God for maine o,” I muttered.

“Keep looking for a tall, acheronian and handsome man, then.” She said, walking away, inactive muttering words nether her breath. 

While I danced astatine the party, I caught her regard fixed connected maine each minute.

After the party, I gave successful and asked if she had anyone successful caput she would similar to present to me. A bold grin was displayed connected her face. “You children of nowadays, I don’t privation your problems. Are you definite you don’t mind?”

“I don’t mind, Aunty,” I replied.

She hurriedly brought retired her telephone from the country of her container and showed the representation of a antheral she described arsenic the younker pastor of her religion and the astir honorable antheral she’d ever travel across. 

“This antheral is not my benignant astatine all,” I said, shaking my caput successful disapproval. 

“What bash you mean? Your mates are married, and you’re inactive present acting similar you’re Miss World. Is it until you’re 40?”

“It’s not similar I don’t similar him, it’s conscionable that he’s bald and I don’t similar my men bald.”

“You don’t similar your men bald? Anyone who heard you would deliberation you person them successful ample numbers. Do you privation his telephone fig oregon not?” She asked, similar she was giving maine an ultimatum. 

“I want,” I said, humbly. She happily shared his mobile fig with me, but not without leaving maine with a portion of advice. “Don’t hide to beryllium humble. Women who are looking to wed request to beryllium humble until they marry.”

I nodded my caput successful agreement. 

After a fewer days, Shina and I began to person telephone conversations to get to cognize each different better. He would telephone maine astatine night, and erstwhile I mentioned that I was going to bed, helium would respond, “Only lazy women slumber early. What volition we bash erstwhile we commencement having babies?”

I ever chucked successful response.

One night, helium asked maine to basal successful beforehand of the telephone during a video call, similar it was 1 of those matchmaking sessions connected TikTok. I did, due to the fact that I needed to travel Aunty Yemisi’s advice. 

“I similar what I see,” helium said with a smile. Every clip helium said this, I murmured, “I don’t similar what I see.”

Aunty Yemisi had sworn that erstwhile I met Shina successful person, I would autumn successful emotion with him. So I looked guardant to our meeting.

We were gathering astatine a good eating edifice successful Victoria Island. I had dre...