Behind Closed Doors: The Hidden Pain Of Domestic, Sexual Abuse In Homes

In public, galore couples parade smiles, stock staged laughter, and clasp hands arsenic though each is well. But down closed doors, the world is starkly different. Countless men and women outcry successful soundlessness successful bathrooms, kitchens, and cars , nursing affectional wounds and carnal scars. What starts arsenic emotion often mutates into fear, and affection into violence.

From bandaged hands to swollen eyes, weapon wounds, and bruised bodies, victims of home unit and intersexual unit screen up their symptom with lies: “I slipped connected a tile,” oregon “I deed my caput connected the door.” Shockingly , galore spell to large lengths to support abusive partners , parents and guardians , whether retired of fear, shame, oregon anticipation for change.

Sadly, the soundlessness surrounding antheral victims is particularly deafening. Conditioned to “man up” and endure pain, galore men suppress their trauma, fearing ridicule oregon rejection if they talk up. Society often dismisses their stories, assuming that a antheral cannot beryllium abused , particularly not by a woman.
As a result, countless men endure successful isolation, their voices drowned by stigma, their wounds hidden beneath agelong sleeves and forced smiles. LEADERSHIP Weekend writes that until this soundlessness is broken, the rhythm of maltreatment for some men and women volition proceed to thrive successful the shadows.

When Nigerians perceive “domestic violence,” the representation often conjured is that of a hubby beating his wife. But the world is acold much complex, touching lives successful ways that nine often chooses to ignore.
According to UN Women, astir 1 successful 3 women worldwide,vapproximately 736 million, person experienced carnal oregon intersexual violence, astir often astatine the hands of an intimate partner. In Nigeria, the National Demographic and Health Survey reports that 31 percent of women aged 15 to 49 person suffered carnal violence. Yet emerging information from NGOs uncover a lesser-known truth: implicit 25 percent of men person besides faced maltreatment successful their relationships, challenging the stereotype that home unit affects lone women.

At a caller media parley held successful September to people Domestic and Sexual Violence Awareness Month, Lagos State’s Attorney General and Commissioner for Justice, Lawal Pedro (SAN), revealed alarming statistics. Between August 2024 and July 2025, the authorities recorded nary less than 8,692 cases of home and intersexual violence. Of these, home unit unsocial accounted for 3,685 cases, making it the astir reported transgression successful Lagos during that 12-month period.

Violence doesn’t conscionable hap successful nationalist spaces oregon stereotypical settings, it takes spot down closed doors, often successful silence. It’s recovered successful the homes of widows, children, respected assemblage leaders, and men who seldom talk astir their suffering.

Consider the communicative of Grace Unachukwu, 42, from Owerri, Imo State. After losing her husband, Grace faced a destiny much cruel than she ever imagined. Instead of receiving enactment during her clip of grief, she was accused of witchcraft by her precocious husband’s family, a maneuver utilized to warrant stripping her of rights and dignity.
She was subjected to humiliating “cleansing” rituals, forcibly removed from her home, and near with perfectly nothing. “They took everything, including the pots successful my kitchen,” she recounted. Her maltreatment was masked arsenic tradition, but successful truth, it reflects however harmful taste practices proceed to perpetuate unit and dispossession, particularly against widows.

Grace’s communicative is conscionable 1 among galore that exemplify however home unit extends beyond carnal maltreatment to economic, emotional, and taste oppression. It underscores the urgent request for broad authorities policies.

Grace present lives successful a tiny rented country connected the outskirts of town, her children scattered among relatives. For widows similar her, bereavement marks lone the opening of violence.

In Ibadan, 12-year-old Kemi Ojo endures regular suffering astatine the hands of her stepmother. Physically frail, her assemblage riddled with scars and unfastened wounds, Kemi is beaten for the smallest mistakes and starved adjacent erstwhile nutrient is plentiful. She hides her scars beneath her schoolhouse uniform. “Sometimes I don’t privation to spell home. I’m not her child, truthful she tin dainty maine nevertheless she wants,” Kemi confides.

At school, Kemi often dozes off, excessively anemic from hunger and exhausting chores astatine home. Her notebooks carnivore the stains of tears. Teachers noticed her distress, but erstwhile questioned, Kemi insists she simply fell portion playing oregon that she is “fine.” Her father’s passivity compounds the betrayal; Kemi has travel to recognize that nary 1 volition talk up for her.

Experts pass that children successful stepfamilies look a higher hazard of maltreatment erstwhile guardians presumption them arsenic intruders alternatively than family. The Domestic and Sexual Violence Agency successful Lagos has documented galore cases wherever children l...